Listening to a younger me

I am listening to my own voice from 3 years ago. I am talking about God and faith and life and love. I sound so calm and relaxed. It’s like I had just taken a shot of whiskey and smoked a cigar. My voice sounds different. My parents were raised in Western Pennsylvania and it’s coming out in my accent on the recording.

I talk about how I think a life centered on Christ is the way to contentment. I makes me want to follow Jesus more closely. I say the words with no reservations or pretensions. I sound like I completely believe what I am saying. I realize that in the present, I have been distant from God. Not doubting so much; more so at arms length or something.

I know God can speak through people. I didn’t expect it to be a 21 year old me.

Sometimes I feel like a salesman who doesn’t believe in his own product. Better yet, doesn’t believe his product exists, but there I am … speaking about faith more like a believer and less like a telemarketer.

At the end of the recording, a younger me says, “Thanks and God bless.” Why don’t I say that more to people? Why am I afraid now and wasn’t then? Where has my boldness gone?

I think recordings and writings can act as little time capsules, but be careful … a younger you might turn out to be a more contented you.

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